Thursday, March 02, 2006

Ignorant and simple that' s me! A Mother.

I'd just like to thank Linda Hirshman for enlightening me. Why, all my life I have been thinking I was an intelligent interesting woman; but no, I am ignorant, simple, oppressed and not even happy. Unfulfilled.
Ms. Hirshman really ticked several thousands of moms off last week when she appeared on Good Morning America. I didn't see it - I am too busy being unfulfilled by taking care of my offspring to watch GMA but I did read the article when someone told me about the show.

Ms. Hirshman not only informed me that I was stupid and wasting my life but by implying that taking care of children is not worth while and fulfilling she invalidated entire professional fields such as childcare providers and school teachers. And I would just LOVE to ask her if she really thinks stupid people should be the ones raising and teaching children. I would prefer intelligent people do those things for my children.

This is my favorite quote "One of the things I've done working on my book is to read a lot of the diaries online, and their description of their lives does not sound particularly interesting or fulfilling for a complicated person, for a complicated, educated person." First, that is really scientific research, Sherlock. Second, explain to me how nurturing and caring for the most special spirits on the earth, molding their minds, watching them discover the world, watching them discover themselves is uninteresting or unfulfilling. Third, maybe these things don't SEEM interesting to YOU, that does not mean they are not interesting or fulfilling to the people who do them. What hubris!

" She asks why should business schools give advanced degrees to those who don't use them?" the article goes on to say.
UHHHH. I must say I am not quite sure what is the best way to respond to this kind of logic. Is education ever wasted by those who value it? I use my college education EVERYDAY as a mother, it is hardly wasted. I won't even go into education vs. schooling and which is more valuable and how you get it. Does using an education mean earning a paycheck?

'"I think it's a mistake for these highly educated and capable women to make that choice [to stay home]," said law professor and working mom Linda Hirshman. "I am saying an educated, competent adult's place is in the office.'"

Apparently Ms. Hirshman's view is the ONLY occupations that are valuable are those in the board room, courtroom, and those making money for others who bow down before the almighty dollar. Who makes the food she eats, the clothes she wears and the art she looks at? I guarantee these people do not all posses degrees. Are these jobs not valuable to society? Raising children and providing a home for them and for their fathers to come home to is not valuable? I do a lot of things if you added up all of my occupations you would see that I could command a very high paycheck - I just do my work pro bono (that's a fancy word for free that will make business women think you are OK to the feminist movement.)

"I think that one could argue that these women are letting down the team," Hirshman said. Yeah. Raising a generation of intelligent capable human beings is letting down the team. Someone has to do it and who better than a parent? A parent has a vested interest in the child's well being a parent wants nothing more than for their child to succeed in life - no matter their definition of success. The nanny, daycare worker and school teacher are doing their job and no matter how much they like your kid it is still just their job. They go home and think about their family not yours.

Now, don't come to me with your story about how you HAVE to work and you HAVE to let someone else take care of your kids. That's fine, if you have to work you have to, this is not about that. This is about the people who choose to stay home are being devalued because of that choice.

Just to let you know how deceived I was about my own intelligence and rank on the interesting scale, here is an example. I have a friend, also a stay at home mom, our children are the same age so we often go on walks. During these walks we have time to talk, here are a FEW of the topics we touch on during these strolls of ignorance and simpleness. Economics (Nash and things like that), medicine, politics, human development, society and it herding of the masses, education, reading skills, literature, cooking, nutrition, psychology, philosophy,unethical marketing practices in 3rd world countries, international issues, terrorism and its roots, religion and cultural differences between Americans and the Indian sub-continent, and our children and all related topics.

I also am part of a book group - we don't read the latest popular mystery or trashy novel. We read classic works of literature, philosophy, theology, math, science, and human nature. Then we get together and discuss in the attempt to mold ourselves into leaders in our community.

I am the leader of a local support group for parents and a member of a medical study group of people learning to take care of their families without relying on doctors and insurance companies.

I read voraciously (in books) and learn way too much for my own comfort on current events. I am an artist, I create when I have a spare minute.

Then there is the minor detail of running a household, feeding it, transporting it, and cleaning it. I homeschool my children full time.

Uninteresting, uneducated, not "complex."


In closing Ms. Hirshman and her feminist cronies (FYI - many women find feminists offensive and do not use the term to complement) are obviously feeling threatened that after all their man hating rhetoric and then turning around trying to be just like them, women still WANT to be at home with their families and enjoy it.

Unlike many women I don't apologize for being a stay at home mom by saying "I'm just a mom." I don't embellish by saying "domestic engineer", "chauffeur", "teacher", "housekeeper", "nurse", "cook", etc. I don't feel I need to. If other people don't know how hard stay at home moms work, and what they do all day SHAME ON THEM.

I am a mother.

prelude

The baby is here. 3 kids is TOUGH - suddenly you seem always busy, even more busy than before. But I have a daughter, how exciting to be raising a girl who will someday be a mother raising her own children. Of course I am treating her like a doll; after 2 boys I deserve to. We get all dressed up almost everyday. I spend more time planning what she will wear than what I will.

We have a wee nursing hitch. I have an oversupply of milk and forceful letdown, which means Nut doesn't have to work too hard to eat which has developed a lazy latch as well as gulping lots of air when she eats, and she spits up a lot. But we are getting through it and she is an excellent little pottier which make life SO easy.