An Open Letter to the People Who Make DVDs

Dear People Who Make DVDs (especially DVDs for kids,)

Let me explain to you how DVDs work in a household with children, it may not be ideal or right but it is how it works.

One or more or all of these things is happening at the same time: The baby is crying and needs to be fed/changed/held, the telephone is ringing, something is on the stove, mom HAS to take 30 seconds for herself to use the toilet or shower, somebody is hurt or is hurting another, someone is very hungry, Mom has a deadline and/or a headache. Add to this a small child who wants to watch a DVD! Most likely the child has been begging or whining for quite some time about the DVD or something else. Mom finally gives in and says to herself "A movie will keep him/her/them quiet for a few minutes!" And she goes to put in the DVD.

This is the part where it really gets ugly, the children know they are going to get what they want so they stop trying to be good and begin chanting or whining "I wanna watch (insert annoying cartoon character's name here)" over and over again. Mom is doing all of this as quickly as possibly and at last the TV is turned on and the DVD is inserted. Then mom has to wait (she still has to pee you know) while the previews play and won't allow her to get to the menu or even more annoying there is a long cutesy DVD introduction where fairies fly through the back ground and turn a pumpkin into a magic fairy land and then sit down to have tea and to who knows what else all before Mom is allowed to select PLAY MOVIE!

I realize that you DVD makers don't get to use a lot of creativity and this is your one time to shine but let me be brutally honest here. NOBODY appreciates it. It annoys everyone. the only people who like watching pieces of the still picture from the film slowly materialize are your fellow DVD makers at your DVD making conferences and award parties.

If you want to make cutesy introductions with some one's movie do it on your own time and post it on YouTube. Please give us moms a break and take a cue from Nickelodeon's DVDs and make your DVDs play automatically with a continuous loop.

Sincerely,
Samurai Mom