All is Well

"Why should we mourn or think our lot is hard?
'Tis not so; all is right.
Why should we think to earn a great reward if we now shun the fight?
Gird up your loins; fresh courage take.
Our God will never us forsake;
And soon we'll have this tale to tell-
All is well! All is well!"

Life has been really hard lately.

Nothing terrible has happened and we are all healthy and happy it is just that life hasn't been as charmed these last few months it once was.
The other night I was lying in bed thinking, and I realized that a LOT has happened to me in the last 6 months, some of it good, some of it bad and some of it neither good nor bad, but they have all been hard things. All of them take some adjusting. I got out a paper and pen to write them down and there were 38, right off the top of my head, 38 hard things. Regardless, I am sure that I look much older than I did 6 months ago.

Some of the good things were moving into my dream house, having my sister move to town, having my parents come visit, my dad buying me an amazing mailbox, my eldest son turning 10 and having a great response to my hair accessories. I had a wonderful Retro Housekeeping Party and a lovely inaugural Memorial Day barbecue.

Some of the neutral hard things were having my brother-in-law move in with us for a month, trying to set up a new house and be friendly with the new neighbors, I put my house up for sale, showed a house for 3 months while living in it with kids, I moved house. I have to live without my washer and dyer and refrigerator until the old house sells.

Some of the bad hard things were my sister breaking my heart and getting married without any of her family there, my old house still not selling and watching home sales plummet since the day we put it on the market, My tooth troubles reached a peak with a crown, mercury removal sickness, residual pain and extreme sensitivity = pain.

I had find a job. Looking for a job was one of the most humiliating things I have ever had to do. Finding a job is not easy these days (especially after a 10 year hiatus from the work force) and the indignity of on-line applications knows no bounds. It wasn't the fact that I had to look for a job that was humiliating, it was the way I was treated, disrespected, patronized, taken advantage of and ignored.

After a month of job searching all I had to show for it was 3 severely neglected children, 2 interviews at The Spaghetti Factory but no job and finally a job as a contractor for a sewing business, which was not fun, barely paid and from which I was fired this week. I am an outstanding seamstress and I was fired. Fired! I can't even get a job and the one measly bit of work I get I can't even keep. I used to think I would be able to make a living if I needed to and now I feel pretty useless.

Which leads me to mention my sewing rut. Things are not going well in my sewing studio these days. Everything I make has a dreadful flaw and takes twice as long to make as it should. It happens to everyone and normally, I would just it off to bad luck and persevere, but suddenly my sewing needs to pay and my time is money. The sweater I have been working on since Christmas is still an UFO.

And money, when you have 2 mortgages to pay, houses to maintain, a new house to furnish, and 2 yards to maintain, money becomes annoyingly scarce and I find myself really worrying about what will happen if the car breaks down, or if someone gets sick or if ANYTHING unexpected happens.

To top it all off like a moldy banana peel on the top of this pile of kitchen waste is the fact that this has been the coldest, wettest, most gray spring ever. Portlanders come together to complain about the weather, usually we don't talk about the weather, but we all reached our limit in May and this June stuff is driving us mad. We say things like "Can you believe this rain?" In Portland! While I was picking up strawberries at a stand this week I was trapped under the tent for 10 minutes while I waited for the hail to stop. My kids were 5 feet away in the car.

I realize that all in all I am very blessed and my troubles are small compared to others. But it has been a lot to handle in 6 months and I am really feeling the strain. I know that the Lord is preparing me for something, trying to teach me things and I am trying to accept it all gracefully, but it doesn't make it less hard to get through it.

There have been so many blessings in the midst of all of this turmoil and I am grateful for them every day. I have 3 wonderful, beautiful, healthy smart children, a loving husband who is a great provider. I live in the promised land. My husband has a job. I live in my dream house.

As I was watching General Conference the phrase "The mother should not work outside home" kept running through my mind over, and over, and over again. I feel so blessed that I haven't had to work outside of the home, that was a special prompting and I am glad that I have so far been able to follow it.

I have wonderful friends and family who have helped us through all of this. Relationships have been deepened and strengthened. Love, joy and service abounds.

So I try to keep my chin up, focus on the good and keep plodding along. Sometimes I think simply "All is Well."

Camp Zarahemla

Just a few last words about Camp Zarahemla. It was beautiful. We were threatened with hypothermia if we were even in the water for a few moments so swimming was not allowed. I was highly suspicious of this claim for many reasons one of which being there was no snow along the actual lake edges. Jewel Basin, Strawberry Lake, June. I swam in it I did not get even a touch of hypothermia, Clear Lake was lower in elevation AND there was no glacier feeding it. Don't tell a girl from Glacier country about hypothermia. (I also went surfing in Cornwall in October which was VERY cold.) I did take all 3 of my kids out in a canoe and we had a great time even thought it started raining. I love canoes!

This is Nicki on the porch of our cabin overlooking the lake. The cabins were lush. Real walls no cracks, actual windows with glass and working screens. Lights, outlets a mini fridge, a microwave and......

A gas stove with a thermostat. We had that cabin toasty warm.
There was of course a lodge with kitchen, bathroom and showers. There was a great playground for the little ones, and the big ones too. There were port-a-potties near all cabins and each cabin had a fire pit with cords upon cords of seasoned firewood. The cabins even had Christmas lights hanging outside.
I am so glad we went. We had such a great time.

Sabbath Leaves

Our Beautiful World: Isn't the marriage of a man and woman beautiful? What a blessing to have a companion for life and eternity. Ying and yang, to parts making a whole, two people becoming one.

Blessings:I am so grateful for Sarah who took time out of settling into a new house, six beautiful daughters and helping her husband recover from a stroke to take some very special pictures for our family. HERE is a preview of them. I hope Heavenly Father gives Sarah extra special blessings for this kind act of service.

Fasting for: Our country that the Lord will protect it and guide the voter's to choose candidates and laws that will be good for our country. For the good people in California who have been fighting tirelessly to protect marriage in their state. We know that wheresoever California goes there goes the nation. This video is heartening.

First ImPRESSions

My sister-in-law mercifully warned me about how painful it is as your ears deal with the pressure when you are landing in Hawaii. I was prepared with gum, something I never have or chew, but it didn't help. The pain was so extreme I wished my head would just explode and get it over with. Not only that but I spent the first 3 hours in paradise hearing in a disconcerting muffled manner.
Hawaii was not as green as I expected it to be. This was a crushing blow. I come from the Pacific Northwest, the Flathead Valley and England; I had serious green expectations for Paradise and green. They say that Kauai was is in a draught, I guess that would account for the color and I will forgive them.

Lobstergram!

I didn't want to do it, I really didn't want to do it. The weather made me do it. Then entire month of May there were only 4 sunny days so there wasn't much opportunity to acclimate my pale skin to the suns shining rays. So this week I caved to the advice of many, many others and I went to a tanning booth. The first time though of questionable a sanitary condition was uneventful. The second time felt more hygienic and was also uneventful. The third time turned my backside into a bright red lobster. I am so mad, I wanted to avoid a sunburn by doing the tanning sessions. I didn't want a self inflicted burn. It doesn't hurt too much.

The final straw

That's it. I can't take it anymore. I can't remember the last time I saw the sun...two weeks ago???
It is 65 degrees inside my house, I am wearing a wool turtleneck, knee-socks, jeans and wool slippers and I am still cold. It is June 5th for Pete's sake!
I went to the "internets" to see what the weather is like in Hawaii (I will be there in just 8 days) and it is raining there too. It is supposed to rain all week there. If I have a rainy 2 week vacation (for which I have waited 30 years) in paradise I might just lose my mind completely.
I will not die in vain though - I will make sure I take down the IRS when I go. The taxpayers will rejoice. (Yes, I realize the Homeland Security will now be tracking my blog; but hey, I need more readers)